Truth is not an opinion (belief), nor is truth honesty (moral issue). When interacting with clients it is important to keep in mind that our clients are either telling the truth, lying, or witholding information.
The primary reason why people do not tell the truth is fear. The truth exposes them as they really are and many people live with a deeply held fear that if they expose their real selves, and people don't like what they see, this will lead to rejection.
To discover your values you can do the following:
- visualise a person you most admire
- sum up 3 qualities of that person
- these qualities are values that you think are very important - you are either living according to them right now or you want to achieve them.
- Select 15 values that truly speak to you out of the following list:
| Family Happiness | Personal Development (use of personal potential) |
| Health | Self Respect (sense of personal identity, pride) |
| Competitiveness (winning, taking risk) | Recognition (Status, recognition from others) |
| Friendship (Close relationship with others) | Advancement (promotions) |
| Affection (love, caring, etc.) | Religion/Spirituality (strong religious/spiritual beliefs) |
| Wisdom (discovering and understanding knowledge, etc) | Loyalty |
| Fame (being well known or famous) | Adventure (new challenges) |
| Achievement (a sense of accomplishment) | Sexual Orientation (having strong identity to sexual orientation) |
| Wealth (getting rich, making money) | Involvement (belonging, being involved with other people |
| Economic Serenity | Economic Security |
| Freedom (independence and autonomy) | Pleasure (fun, laughs, a leisurely lifestyle) |
| Integrity (honest, sincerity, standing up for oneself) | Power (control, authority, or influence over others) |
| Inner Harmony (being at peace with oneself) | Responsibility (being accountable for results) |
| Creativity (being imaginitive, innovative) | Order (stability, conformity, and tranquillity) |
| Helpfulness (helping others, improving society) | Gender (having strong identity to gender) |
| Cooperation (working well with others, teamwork) | Culture (race or ethnicity identity) |
| ... | ... |
- Narrow it down to the top 10
- From your top 10 list, select the five that are most important to you
- From the list of your top five values you must select the top one, the one out of all the rest that speaks to you. Do not discard the rest, they are still important to you, you just want to select the one that when all else fails, you revert to. This is what your life is oriented around.
- Write a definition for each of your top five values
- Print the result of your work and refer to it often
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